Thursday, September 24, 2009

Morning musing

This morning was not one of these, but have you ever had one of those days where you accidentally wake up at an early hour of the morning (hours earlier than you would normally), and then not go back to sleep? I think it's kinda nice to walk around the house quietly, knowing everyone else is sleeping (if there is anyone else). It's even nicer when nobody's around. I don't know about you, but I seem to find myself doing things getting things done, reading, making a good breakfast, taking a walk, etc. It's quite beneficial. For one, by the time you would normally be waking up, chances are you've already done some of the shit you have to do to get out the door for work/school/whatever. Two, you give yourself a sort of meditation period/wake-up session. After reading the paper or taking a walk or making a fried egg, you notice how awake you feel, without grogginess or tired muscles, or half-open eyes. Maybe it's just me and this is what normal people do on a normal day. I don't know, but if I could get more work done earlier in the night in time to get to bed at a decent hour, I would like to wake up early most mornings. You know what they say about "early to bed, early to rise" and how it "makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise". This shit can work. But alas, I tend to stay up too late doing nothing even though I might be tired, and hit snooze until I am rushing for the bus un-showered and I wake up somewhere between my first and second class when hunger strikes along with a sense of pissed-offness.
While I'm pondering, don't you wish you were the only person on Earth who had a one-man space ship you could fly up into the great black with whenever you wanted without anybody knowing? This thing would be like a floating armchair/corner of a room. With a little end table, radio, ashtray, lamp, reclining capability. Oh, but it would all be in a really crystal clean, super-transparent, ultra heat-proof glass dome. I would love to just take off when I'm stressed or relaxed or worried or just overwhelmed by everyday minutiae backed up in my head. Just to hang out with the stars, floating gently around the planet completely separated from everything. I say separated, but as I typed that, I thought maybe I wouldn't be separated. I wouldn't know, but I can imagine feeling overly connected with the planet at moments like that. You look down on her like "Wow...this is where I live, where I was born, where anything anybody I know has ever said or done or thought of saying or doing took place". Then you'd think of all the bad stuff that's going on there, and have this question: "I love that place...should I go back and help it? I couldn't go back and not help it...Should I even go back? What can I do to show that place I love it? Can I make it better?". And I would hope that people would come back with a clearer understanding of this world, and maybe some good ideas for when they get back. I guess that's what astronauts go through. I've never spoken to one, but they must be interesting people (at least the ones who haven't been paid/threatened by NASA to remain silent...HAH!). I wonder what kind of great things former astronauts have done upon returning to Earth after looking at it from such a unique point of view...literally being "on top of the world". Maybe they just come down missing that place to themselves up in space. Maybe they feel a sense of godliness and that's it. Maybe they just return to normal life and go home and hug their loved ones. Maybe some are terrified of even returning to that place. All I can assume is that anybody who goes up into outer space, and looks down upon this BILLIONS-of-years-old thing that birthed water, plants, animals, humans and all that has come from those things themselves, cannot come back unchanged. I kinda went off on a tangent there, but that kind of takes me back to my original thought. If I were to have a personal recliner-ship that could take me up whenever I pleased, could I come back down unphased? Would I after my 5th, 3rd, even 2nd time up there? I think everything is that way. You get too used to a morning routine, waking up at a certain time, rushing for the bus, eating a crappy breakfast, seeing the same people, going to the same workplace, classes, gym, watching the same television. It's not a bad thing, necessarily. It's comforting, and that's really good. But you just forget sometimes how great it is to have your friends, your school, your morning routine, your loved ones, etc. Sometimes take it all for granted.

-Eric


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