Saturday, December 27, 2008

N-E-S-T-L-E-S doesn't make the very best...

...I DO, MO'FUCKA!
I just baked some delicious chocolate chip cookies. My first time baking home-made chippers, and I gotta say, they came out pretty good. I included 1 full cup of Hershey's semisweet morsels, 1 full cup of Diamond chopped walnuts, some eggs, other shit, and a whole lot of love. End result = mouthgasm. Is making yourself cookies that give you mouthgasms considered masturbation? Possibly. Am I ashamed? Hell No.
Hello again. I say this as if you've read what I wrote before this sentence at the time I wrote it, which was probably almost two hours ago. Anyway, I am finishing this post, but have a new story to add!
I'm sitting here blogging...(I now realize why I paused the post)...and I see my Lava Lamp next to me. It dawned on me that I hadn't turned it on in a very long time, so while I was sitting next to it, I figured I'd pop it on and get all...psychedelic? I don't know. I just felt like seeing it, plus I had weed on the brain and I haven't smoked in about a week, so I figured "why not". Funny thing about weed...
After a short while of seeing no bubbly-ness in the bottle, I got a little impatient with the lamp as I normally do, and checked to see if the bulb was heating up alright. I lift the bottle from the base (where the bulb is, of course) and POOF! like a genie from a lamp, a little plume of smoke pops out of the base. "THAT probably isn't good," I think to myself, and open up my window, turn my ceiling fan on full blast, and pull the plug on my blue Lava Lamp. I thought the thing had broken and some electrical spark set something on fire in the base. It hadn't hit me until I really focused on how the smoke smelled - WEED! I looked inside the base, and sure enough - a little pink gram-bag of crappy weed from who-knows-when was chilling - NO - MELTING onto the bulb and still smoking. I vaguely remember hiding weed from my parents in there (like an idiot) some time ago, but I'm not sure how long ago it was. Like I said, I hadn't used the Lava Lamp in a long time. So now after picking the melted bag off of the bulb, flushing it, and spraying the air, the smell of vaporized weed is clear from my room, and I am left with no pot to actually smoke. Wouldn't that have been a nice surprise though, say, if I had for some reason lifted up the bottle BEFORE turning the lamp on? Ah, well... a lesson was learned. Never put weed in such a weird spot that you forget about it and almost burn something more valuable down (dresser, room, house, etc.) Could you imagine if I had left the room? Bad news.
Now it's time to watch something for free on the internet. That's always good. I think I'll go get a couple cookies from before to accompany whatever I might tune-in to. Goodnight!

-Eric

2 comments:

  1. Technically I think it would be considered mouthsterbation...
    and that sucks tht you didnt find that bag until after it had begun melting, finding weed you hid from yourself when you were drunk is always awesome.

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  2. good weed? maybe
    good read? yes

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